Monday, August 6, 2007

I Can't Believe I Just Bought a $100 Trash Can...

Yes, it is true. That would make it roughly $1.00 per gallon since the can is 96 gallons and that is what I paid for it yesterday.

Why on earth would anyone buy a hundred dollar trash can? Excellent question.

It all started with a small, consistent noise I heard while relaxing by the computer last Sunday night. We had just arrived home from our long camping weekend and I followed the sound to our large, upright freezer in the basement. That is when I made the horrific discovery. The freezer door was partially open. Now I have to tell you that I let out a great shout even though the children were all soundly sleeping. Frankly, I think I nearly had a stroke. I ranted for a good ten minutes. There was quite a bit of stomping, slamming, and lamenting going on. My husband wisely just listened and apologized and promised he'd clean up the mess.

What mess?

Well that would be the mess that melted, uncooked bunches of food makes when a freezer thaws out and you are blissfully unaware. We were gone four days and most of the food was a loss.

What did I lose?

Meat- a turkey, some roasts, chicken- all uncooked and either marinated or not...
Fun Stuff- ice cream, ice sticks for the kids (which could probably take a million thaws and freezes)
Fruit- probably 12 gallons of apples sliced for pies and crisps, at least 5 or more containers of homemade applesauce (both harvested and processed last fall), 30 lbs of strawberries- painstakingly hulled and sliced or made into jam, and of course the aforementioned 17 qts of blueberries we harvested and froze only a week or so ago.

We shut the door so it would all freeze again and we waited. This past weekend my husband graciously began the task of defrosting the freezer and throwing out all that stuff. I will admit that I am attempting to save the recently frozen fruit. What's the worst that can happen? Wait. Don't tell me.

Oh yes...the trash can. When all this food was hauled outside in the very warm weather you can imagine how much the flies loved it. You can imagine how much the trash guys are going to love us by Wednesday. If we weren't going to host every animal in the next three counties, we needed to circle the wagons!

The solution...a honkin' huge trash can (as I5 would say). We set out on a mission after church to find said trash can and after three stops on the way home we were empty handed. Then we found one online that would suit nicely...sure we could get away with 64 gallons, but no. Our current trash can (which is my husband's arch nemesis) was already close to that. No, we needed the BIG one. We unhitched the seats out of our van and headed for Lowe's.

I think the most fun were the comments by the sales girl.

Sales girl: "That is the biggest trash can I've ever seen. Do you have a daycare or something?"
Me: "I've got a lot of trash. Family of six."
Sales girl: "Wow I can't believe it costs that much!"
Me: "Yeah...I can't wait to tell my friends about my $100 trash can."
Sales Girl (this is where it gets funny and I start to wonder): "Do they even make trash bags this big?"
Me: " Uh...no, but I sure can fit a lot of bags in there."
Sales Girl: "My can was $5 at walmart, but I do have to empty it everyday."
Me: "Uh-Huh, well I've got a lot of stinko trash and this will hold it all."

It occurred to me later as I played the dialogue through in my head that this girl perhaps thought this can was going into my kitchen or something. I guess she's got the luxury of a dumpster nearby 'cause she obviously didn't get the whole "put trash out and take it to the curb once a week" philosophy.

Before you start to wonder how we as a family could produce that much landfill mass, please let me allay your fears. Where we live you pay for trash by the bag... $1 a bag plus we pay quarterly for the fine gentleman to come by each week and take away our tagged ($1 a tag) bags. So, we recycle a lot!

Composting is another story, but let's not get carried away. My husband already rides a bus to work each day. We are a one car family who recycles a lot. That's about as green as I'm comfortable with for now. If we get any greener, they may take my husband's registered Republican status away.

PS- Go Hokies!

1 comment:

Heather said...

OMG Heather! Thanks for the laugh and the relating! Mine was not nearly as bad as yours so I can feel a little better. :) And dang on the trash can...really? WOWZERS!